I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 22 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.
Here are my thoughts about marriage, family, raising children, humor, faith and the life God intended for us all. I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 23 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.
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Trey,
Thank you so much for sharing this post. It is exactly what I needed to read today. My husband recently had a “texting” affair with a woman and it has hurt me to the core to know he said some of the things he did to this other woman. I was informed the affair was emotional, not physical, but the hurt is the same.
I love my husband dearly and although my heart still has pains from this, I cannot imagine letting 20 years of marriage go down the drain. I agree with what she said in her post. If you do not please your husband, someone else will. It is not giving him a free pass or excuse, but I do have to meet his needs. Period.
Satan is ever present in our community right now. I am seeing marriage after marriage destroyed and it is so sad. I think technology is a wonderful thing, but I also believe it is a vehicle for people to have affairs. There is so much privacy and secrecy involved.
Your blog is very inspiring to me. God is wonderful!
Anonymous – My heart hurts for you. I’m sorry what you’ve gone through. You bring up an interesting point. As great as cellular phones are, they also can be used for bad. I find it interesting that many affairs have started by simple text messaging. I also thing it says something that in this day and time 80% of those who find out their spouse is cheating, did so through their spouses text messages.
Thanks for your words….
Trey
Great link Trey, thanks.
Very important things to discuss and see other people’s perspective.
I cringe when I hear, “if you don’t please your husband, someone else will.”
Paul warned against getting married at all, because he said that then what you will be doing is thinking only of pleasing your spouse and not God.
Men cheat because they want something else – some thrill. Too bad. If I don’t ‘PLEASE MY HUSBAND’ tough beans! If they want a taste of some other meat and go after it, Jesus said that this is one of the fair justifications for divorce.
Trey,
A year ago my husband had sex with my best friend, whom I had met at our new church, while I was at school. Three months later I found that he had written a love e-mail letter to his ex-wife. All of his friends are female and he IM/Chats with them on his own e-mail account and can't understand why I bought a computer spy service to be able to see what he writes to these other women. Do you think there's a problem with any kind of message written to other women without my being able to see it, such as if he uses the computer at work. He reads your pages and respects your opinions about things, so I very much covet your input, as well as that of other Christian men. Thanks in advance for addressing this subject for us.
P.S. I am willing to try to make this marriage work, but I think Christian counseling for both of us is needed, don't you?
Kathi … First, let me say I'm sorry you've been hurt. I don't know what all you've been through, but my heart does hurt for you.
Also, let me say I've preached since day 1, "No secrets in marriage." I hide nothing. No email address, password, facebook conversation … nothing. I do not hide my text messages from my wife, nor does she hide them from me. No secrets is the only way.
Also, any friendship with a person of the opposite sex that my wife is uncomfortable with, I will break off. I have addressed this in this post:
http://www.treymorgan.net/2007/05/emotional-adultery.html
Make sure you read the comments too. And yes, professional counseling is a must.
I actually intended on addressing this subject this week. You might allow me to address this more next week and allow your husband to read it there.
Your marriage is in my prayers.