THE DIRTY JOKE

I love a good joke, and when I heard “this” one, I knew I had a keeper. Preachers are always looking for good stories and jokes, and I had just added a great one to my arsenal. I immediately shared it with Lea. I was surprised that she didn’t find the joke all that funny, and thought to myself, “She wouldn’t know a good joke if she heard one.”

Within the next twenty-four hours I shared my new joke with a handful of church folk and community folk. I was like a grandparent with a picture of a new grandchild, showing it off to everyone who would listen. To top it all off, I had just got a new email address so as I shared my new email address with everyone, I included my new joke.

About a day later I mentioned something to Lea again about my new joke that I’d been telling, and she said with a confused look on her face, “You do know that’s a dirty joke, don’t you?” I immediately took up for my new joke and said, “What? Are you nuts? It is NOT a dirty joke. There is NO way it means THAT,” and then immediately starting thinking, “Lea’s mind is in the gutter. And she calls herself a preacher’s wife!” She’s usually right about 98% of the time in our marriage, but this time I knew she was wrong. We argued for a few more minutes and she finally said, “Fine, don’t believe me, but at least ask someone else.”

I refrained from telling my joke the rest of the day for fear that Lea somehow might be right. That night at church I caught one of my favorite deacons, the one I knew who would shoot straight with me. Just before class started, I pulled him aside and told him my joke. He laughed and said, “I love that joke.” I said, “Yea, me too. Eddie, is that a dirty joke?” He told me, “No way that’s a dirty joke. It’s a great joke. There’s nothing dirty about it.”

I thanked Eddie, and could not wait for church to be over to gloat in front of Lea the fact that it wasn’t a dirty joke, and that she had a dirty mind. It wasn’t more than one minute into my class lesson when Eddie came walking up to the front of my class. I was a little confused why he was interrupting my class. I asked everyone to just give me a second. I walked over to where Eddie was waiting for me and leaned in to hear what he had to say. “I just got the joke,” he said rather emphatically, “It’s dirty. It’s REALLY dirty. DON’T tell that joke to anyone!” Eddie, being the good deacon he was, had stopped my class to protect me. He thought I was going to share the joke from the pulpit (which at the time was very possible).

The rest of my class was like a bad dream. I couldn’t concentrate on what I was supposed to be teaching for thinking over and over, “Who all have I told this dirty joke to?” “Who all do I need to go apologize to?” and “How could Lea be right again?”

I immediately went into damage control mode following services. I started catching, calling and emailing people that I had told that horrible joke to. How could I have been so wrong?There were men and women who I apologized to, but thankfully no children. I had to call my mom (who had the soap ready to wash out my mouth :), an elder, a couple of preacher friends of mine and the worse by far was my Uncle Bob, who is one of the most godly men I know.

There would be no celebrating or gloating this time. Instead there was only humiliation, apologies and the loss of what I thought was an A+ joke. Once again Lea was right, and I was wrong. No wonder she didn’t find the joke funny when I first told her.

“There is a way that seems right unto a man, but in the end it leads to death…”
Proverbs 16:25.

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Article by Trey Morgan

I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast. Read 1182 articles by
36 Comments Post a Comment
  1. Tucker says:

    A lot of times I find my mouth is swollen because my foot is in it. Not just jokes, but many things I say before my brain can kick in and say, “You shouldn’t say that!”

    I have been there, many times! I just keep learning to have a better control of my tongue.

  2. Gilbert Kerrigan says:

    Is it wrong that I want you to tell me the joke?

  3. Jeff Slater says:

    E-mail the joke to me. I want to be sure I don’t tell it…..

  4. TREY MORGAN says:

    You don’t know how many times I’ve been asked over on the side, “Can you tell me the joke?” HA!

    Maybe I can tell it on my blog tomorrow … kidding. Lea won’t allow it :)

  5. Tim Archer says:

    I had something similar happen to me in Argentina. I used the expression “If you want to make an omelette, you have to break a few eggs.” Problem is, “eggs” in Argentina refers to a part of the male anatomy, and “break eggs” is a common crude expression.

    Oops!

  6. Jason says:

    Is it something about a baby being born?

  7. Soren says:

    Dude, I feel your pain.
    But it is kinda funny.

  8. TREY MORGAN says:

    Tim – Good stuff :)

    Jason – Durbin?

  9. brandon price says:

    Wow…that was funny. Hate those moments.

    You mentioned you changed your e-mail address? Would you mind sending it to us because we just tried sending you something yesterday and we want to make sure you got it.

    Thanks,

    Brandon

  10. Maria says:

    Been there, done that! OMG! I even e-mailed it to Jim McGuiggan, who is like next in line to Jesus in my book.I am only grateful that the Lord knew my heart concieved no malice at the time, just thought it was funny! I was innocent I tell ya, innocent!!!
    But I too did offer 1023 pardons to everyone I had unintentionally sinned against! ;0)

  11. Matthew says:

    I know how you feel. I was using a word that meant nothing to me but a put down but some of these Christians around were saying it was a bad word. I still disagree but quit using the word.

  12. Scott says:

    Been there and I still taste the soap!

    Thanks for sharing.

  13. cwinwc says:

    Humor is sometimes a weakness of mine in that I’m such a fun-miester I sometimes forget what is in good taste and bad. My wife is “my Lea” when it comes to that department as well.

    On a different note – Stoogelover told me of the time that he went to the Promise Keepers Pastors Conference in Atlanta. The Georgia Dome was full of preachers (tough crowd) at each session.

    Greg said the very first Keynote speaker led off with a joke that most preachers knew. There was polite / faked laughter.

    The first Keynote of the next morning led off with the very same joke. Polite laughter but less of it was the response from the sold out Georgia Dome preacher crowd.

    You can probably guess that the Keynote guy after lunch, yes, led off with the very same joke! Greg said the response was a dead quiet Georgia Dome!

    Gotta know your crowd.

  14. L.C.T. says:

    I’m with the “what’s the joke” crowd. You have my email – please send it to me! I’m more curious as to how some people didn’t get that side and some did. Humour my curiosity :) and if you’ve lost my email it’s lctheaven@ukonline.co.uk

  15. Wade Tannehill says:

    Too funny! But how embarrasing!

  16. Donna G says:

    My current boss did that with an email that was funny…but he forgot to read the whole thing. IT was very off color at the end. He had a very somber apology at our next officer’s meeting. He always strives to keep our organization running on Christian principals. I confess, I laughed at the joke….

  17. TREY MORGAN says:

    LCT – I’m thinking of using the joke next year when we do another “Feed the Dump People” marathon. You know, make a $50 donation and you get to hear the joke. LOL

  18. Jason says:

    Yes. That’s me. Am I right?

  19. TREY MORGAN says:

    Yea… I knew it had to be you… you knew the joke. Do you mean you actually remember me telling it? TOO FUNNY!

  20. Jason says:

    You never told it to me. I overheard mom and dad talking about it. Apparently you had emailed it to your mom, too?

    In all seriousness, it’s a good joke. A bit gross and dirty, but funny. I’ve made many people laugh with it. All thanks to you! Haha.

  21. Jesterhawk says:

    I can’t tell you how many times in my 18 years of marriage I have been in your shoes over one thing or another where I was certain that my wife was wrong and I was going to gloat only to find out yet again I was wrong.

    Great post!!

  22. Warren Baldwin says:

    Trey,
    I’m like some of the others here who think we could better evaluate this situation if we knew the joke! But I know that wouldn’t be appropriate. And, yes, I have been here on a couple of occasions with my wife. I’ve learned to follow her lead. Good post.

  23. Laura says:

    I’d like to know who tells an inappropriate joke to a preacher in the first place.

    It is a very funny story, though.

  24. westcoastwitness says:

    I visited the UK one time and cussed in church without knowing it.

    They let me know pretty quickly.

  25. TREY MORGAN says:

    Jason … you’ve made my day. I’ve laughed and laughed about you knowing that. I guess that old joke won’t ever die.

    Jesterhawk – I feel your pain, my brother :)

    Laura – I think someone emailed it to me along with everyone in their address book.

    westcoast – I have yet to cuss from the pulpit … (knock on wood)

  26. Peter P says:

    No WAY.

    You can’t write that much about the joke and give us no hint about what it was….

    I know, go to FOTTSP.blogspot.com and post it as a guest blogger on there, they won’t mind.

    Probably.

  27. Anonymous says:

    i believe this one is a rerun or someone else has blogged the same joke story… just the same, loved reading all the comments.

  28. TREY MORGAN says:

    Peter P – Checked out that link. Maybe they’ll let me right there :)

    Anonymous – I’ve told the story, but never blogged about it. Blessings.

  29. Cussed In Front Of Church Folks Once And Would've Liked To Died On The Spot :) says:

    I love when you screw up because you always tell on yourself and it is hilarious!(And your stories make me feel better about my own screw-ups.)

    Love the story!

  30. Janice says:

    Hey Trey,

    I’m amused at how many comments the “unknown joke” is getting. I’m guessing we all gravitate to the lighter side of life at times; most of us probably have been in your moccasins at some point.

  31. mattdabbs says:

    Can you forward me the update of your new email address? 😉

  32. katy says:

    can you post a clean version of the joke? you know, fix it up a bit, and maybe it’ll still be funny….or even funnier…

  33. westcoastwitness says:

    At least you didn’t do this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jfjc2Ztd2uY

  34. Anonymous says:

    Trey, I just had to find out what the joke was. Called Sandi and all I said what was the joke and just
    started laughing. She finally remembered it and told me. We did
    laugh. But we went Oh Trey.
    Toni

  35. Gabrielle Eden says:

    Oh sure, you’re going to tell us all that, and then you’re not going to tell us the joke!

    At least, your sermon wasn’t this bad:go here

  36. Jesterhawk says:

    I just posted a story about a time when I thought I was right but I was wrong over on one of my blogs. You can check it out here

About Me

Trey Morgan Here are my thoughts about marriage, family, raising children, humor, faith and the life God intended for us all. I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.

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