MOMS RULE, DADS DROOL

I had big plans for this weekend. Lea is gone with a group of ladies to a Women of Faith conference, and I envisioned a male bonding, bachelor-type weekend with me and the boys. I couldn’t wait to show the boys how much fun dads can be. The rules I laid down for the weekend were simple …

  • Rule #1: Toilet seats are to remain in the raised position all weekend.

  • Rule #2: All hand towels and little fancy soaps are legal to use any time.
  • Rule #3: No glasses this weekend, we drink straight from the milk carton. “But,” I reminded them, “The blue milk carton is mine. Stay out of it because I don’t want any of your ‘kooties.’”

After about 3 hours without Lea, the manly-man weekend had already gone to hell in a hand-basket. In frustration over my lack of supper cooking skills, two of the boys had already asked, “Dad, when is mom coming home?” I still don’t know why the boys didn’t want a bowl of cereal for supper!

  • I missed Lea when it came time to clean up a kitchen that had been totally demolished.
  • I really missed Lea when it came time to get kids in bed by myself.
  • I REALLY missed Lea when it came time to climb into a big king-sized bed all by my lonesome.
  • AND I REALLY REALLY missed Lea at 2 a.m. this morning when Connor got up puking up his guts!!!

All I can say is … “HOW DOES SHE DO IT SO EFFORTLESSLY?” Every time she leaves, I’m slapped in the face by cold reality that, “The world can’t survive without MOMS!” Not only do they run the household, but they seem to do it with very little effort. Moms are superheroes and the world could not survive without them!!!

Thank you Moms for all that you do. AND Lea, if by chance you read this … I can’t wait until you get home! I miss you VERY much! :-)

(Comment of the Day: Tucker said…
“Trey, Don’t you know that women know “the Secrets”? First, there are reasons why they don’t let you use those little fancy soaps…they make you sick, ie. Connor. Couple that with drinking straight from the carton and you are lucky it wasn’t coming out both ends.As for the toilet seat, they should remain in the upright position, it has been proven to be more sanitary as gravity allows germs to fall to the bottom of the seat. I point that out to many women. FYI, I have learned a little trick…help the boys destroy the house, and she will be mighty reluctant to leave again. (Spill Coke on the floor and leave it, that puts them over the edge) She will find it safer to take all of you with her!Good luck, I am sure you will survive.”)

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Article by Trey Morgan

I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast. Read 1182 articles by
24 Comments Post a Comment
  1. ltd51 says:

    The one thing that kept rolling around my head this entire article was “Brownie Points”. I completly understand where you are coming from however. The whole cereal thing boggles my mind too. Lived on that stuff throughout college.
    Have a good weekend.

  2. Linda says:

    Man shall not live on cereal alone!

  3. Timbra says:

    i think connor might be as barfy as alani, as this isn’t the first time we’ve heard of him barfing in the past several months. . . mike has gone out of town ONCE since Alani was born and she barfed the whole time he was away. . . . so maybe it has nothing to do with mom being gone. . . but you do always have lovely things to say about your wife!!!! and MOMS DO ROCK (thanks for noticing)!!!!

  4. Cecelia says:

    Thank you,Trey for the compliment.Andrew tells me all the time what a wonderful mother I am.I don’t see it that way, but hey, it feels good to be told you’re appreciated.

  5. Maria says:

    Thanks Trey, moms are indispensable (grin).
    I was at Walmart the other day and I overhead another mom while on her cell telling her panicing hubby to calm down and that she would be home soon! He was home with their new born baby and was freaking out cause the baby started crying. I so can relate to this woman!

    And double Wow, Lea went on a Women of Faith Confrenece!!! I have always wanted to go to one of those! I am totally tickled pink for her! She so totally deserves it!

    BTW Trey, this too shall pass, lol!! If things get really bad, just slip a bit of NyQuil into their cereal ;)!

    Moms Rule!!Maria

  6. Tucker says:

    Trey,
    Don’t you know that women know “the Secrets”? First, there are reasons why they don’t let you use those little fancy soaps…they make you sick, ie. Connor. Couple that with drinking straight from the carton and you are lucky it wasn’t coming out both ends.

    As for the toilet seat, they should remain in the upright position, it has been proven to be more sanitary as gravity allows germs to fall to the bottom of the seat. I point that out to many women.

    FYI, I have learned a little trick…help the boys destroy the house, and she will be mighty reluctant to leave again. (Spill Coke on the floor and leave it, that puts them over the edge) She will find it safer to take all of you with her!

    Good luck, I am sure you will survive.

  7. karin says:

    I know, your post is supposed to be lighthearted and funny and not meant to be taken so seriously ~ but, I really don’t understand why even men have to put themselves down as though they are totally inept and can’t possibly do what a woman can do and the whole house falls apart when wifey is away. I also hate commercials along those lines. Maybe it was because of the couple dynamic I witnessed at home and the pain it caused. I need to go and see a therapist, lol!

  8. Tucker says:

    Karin, it’s a conspiracy! Men can do just fine, but we would rather eat and drink and watch tv in the house. Trust me, leave a man in the house without a woman for a month and things will be just fine, until 24 hrs before her return.

  9. TREY MORGAN says:

    Maria – 

    Tucker … too funny. I had a friend who swore up and down that right after marriage he ruined a load of clothes on purpose by mixing all the colors together.

    He said it worked perfect, “My wife never asked me to do laundry again.”

    Karin – You’re right … Dads are pretty amazing too.

  10. Maria says:

    you are so funny Tucker and so accurate!

  11. cwinwc says:

    Hopefully no one reads your blog that hangs out at my house but I love Rule #3!

    Go Green – drink from the carton!

  12. Stoogelover says:

    I feel your pain! When Janice goes to Alabama for a week, I HATE it. But I am also very grateful that she can still visit with her mama, so the psycho-pup and I have some quality time during that week. And I drink from the carton at all times because she doesn’t drink milk and the kids are grown and gone.

  13. DJG says:

    what works for the goose….

    I destroyed both a lawn mower and a weed eater in the same day….haven’t had to mow or weed eat since….

    We all have our special talents…

  14. Brie says:

    Hmmm. Kyle does really well by himself. He has a whole day at home with Noah without me every week (yay for him having Mondays off), and I’ve never come home to a house that isin more chaos than it was in when I left it.

    Maybe I just got a really, really talented husband!

  15. That Girl says:

    Newlywed bliss…

    My husband cleans the kitchen every night, vacuums, makes the bed, and because he is obsessed with the lawn, I’m not allowed to do much more than bring him Pepsi One! :)

    I’ll let you know how it’s going after this first year!!!

    Sorry about Connor…even though there are no kids at my house, I hope the husband deals with sickness better than I!

  16. TREY MORGAN says:

    that girl – may I just say that Mr. That Girl is making the rest of us men look like wimps!

  17. Matthew says:

    I have this odd habit having to drink milk from a coffee cup but my diet Pepsi from the bottle, never a can or a two liter bottle, but a half gallon one.

  18. Stephanie says:

    it is nice to hear that you appreciate us moms….these weekends are good for everyone….you are a great dad and husband….just hang in there….we are all prayin’ for you and the boys….haha….steph

  19. newheights says:

    I hear you. I have trouble sleeping whenever my wife is gone.

  20. Cornelius Crew says:

    I’m so sorry that your weekend plans have changed! Here’s hoping it improves and Lea comes home to a clean house!

  21. Anonymous says:

    Trey—-the difference with Ned and I is that we see things differently. For instance “clean”. He calls a house clean if the laundry is all in one big pile rather than sorted into several piles. He thinks the kitchen is clean when all the dirty dishes are in the living room. And I think he likes the “pretty towels” because they give him permission to dry his hands on his pants. He does however make me scrumptious food and try to take really good care of me. He makes me laugh and makes me feel loved so the rest is just the “bones in the chicken”. :)

    Blessings
    neva

    hope Connor is feeling better

  22. Sherri Watt says:

    I just started my blog recently after many people told me I should. I have been checking out other sites. I loved this post!! Keep it up!

    Sherri
    http://beaboutyourfathersbusiness.blogspot.com/

  23. Julie says:

    This was hilarious! My husband does really well taking care of 3 kids (all under 4 yrs. old & the youngest is a newborn) by himself while I get a few hours away. :) He's a real keeper! Sounds like you are a pretty good dad & husband, too.

    Thanks for making me laugh! :)

  24. Scott says:

    Like Karin said, I know you’re writing this to be funny, but brother you (and all men everywhere) should learn how to cook. Watch Emeril and Alton Brown and they will lead you to the promised land. 😉

About Me

Trey Morgan Here are my thoughts about marriage, family, raising children, humor, faith and the life God intended for us all. I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.

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