Men Need Men

I’m sitting in the airport this morning waiting on my flight.  I’ve been thinking all morning about the relationships I have in my life. I’m realizing that some of the most vital relationships in my life are friendships with men. As a man, I desperately need close friendship with other guys who will encourage me as a husband, father and Christian man.

I need accountability that can only come from another man.

Just last week a friend and I were discussing how easy it is for men to fall into the temptation of being unfaithful to their spouse. We had just heard about a church leader who had crashed and burned in his relationship with his wife, children, and God. Later that day, my friend sent me a text message that went like this: “You and I’ve got to understand that nobody’s exempt from Satan’s schemes. Let’s me and you make it our goal to finish strong in our marriage.” That was exactly what I needed to hear.

Men need other men in their lives to encourage them to be real men who love their wives, children and God.

But, doesn’t it’s always seemed that women make friends with other women easier than men make friends with other men. Men seem uncomfortable having close friendships with other men. I heard a man say once, “Oh, men can golf together, fish together and play cards together, but don’t ask men to pray together or encourage one another spiritually. Men are much more comfortable just watching the game and exchanging high-fives when the team scores. But sadly, most men have missed out on spiritual blessings because of their inability to make close spiritual friendships with other men.”

I totally agree.

A man needs brothers in Christ who know him authentically and who are committed to spur him on towards integrity and becoming all that God created him to be. The bottom line fact is that an isolated follower of Jesus is extremely vulnerable to the temptations in today’s world and to the enemy’s schemes. When men choose to go-it-alone spiritually, it’s tough. “And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart,” (Ecclesiastes 4:12). Everyone needs a friend …

  • The Lone Ranger had Tonto
  • Batman had Robin
  • Superman had, well no one, but you’re not Superman!
  • David had Jonathan.
  • Jesus had his friends, the apostles.

We need to be men who are willing to share spiritual struggles and victories with other men whether it looks macho or not. Besides, men, we’ll all have six men to carry us when we’re dead, so who’s going to carry us when we’re alive?

I will admit that I have been blessed with some very close friendships with men in my life. Men that have held me accountable and prayed with me. I can’t imagine what it would be like not to have that in my life.

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Article by Trey Morgan

I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast. Read 1182 articles by
38 Comments Post a Comment
  1. Bromance, much?

    😉

  2. Debbie Holder says:

    I totally agree with you! I have two friends that I have known since junior high, and we get together at least 3 times a year for fellowship! This weekend is our scheduled summer get-together, and I am so excited because our time together is filled with such soul-searching and fellowship! These times together keep me grounded in God’s word!

  3. James Jones says:

    Thank you for pointing this out. I have not thought about this need with much seriousness.

    BTW, Superman did have Jimmy Olsen. Superman was also close with Bruce Wayne, aka Batman. Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent were so close that they confided their weaknesses to one another. That way, if the other ever did turn to the darkside, or go down a bad path, they were prepared to do what was necessary to help and stop the other.

    lol couldn’t resist!

  4. John Knox says:

    Excellent thoughts Trey. You are a positive encourager. I could not agree more with your conclusions. Thank you for being a blessing to many.

  5. Greg England says:

    For 20 years I attended Pepperdine Bible lectures and met up with guys from all around the country. Each Thursday night of that week we would hike out to a remote bluff overlooking the Pacific where we would talk and share our struggles and victories and pray together. I miss that very much.

  6. Randy says:

    I agree… I can have close guy friends, but if one tries to hug me I will probably go Chuck Norris on him….

  7. Jim Martin says:

    Trey– A great post and an important one! You are so right regarding the importance of men needing other men in order to finish strong. Thanks!

  8. Stachia says:

    I am sure that it is the same for men as it is for women. I am truly blessed to have a group of friends that I know will not only pray for me but with me. For the last 5 years I have been going to OKC for the Women of Faith conferences and each year our group has grown. We started out with just 12 and this last year there was 26 and it is a great time to just get to visit and talk with each other. We sing each night in our rooms, have short devos, pray together, and just fellowship, will miss it this year because of schedule conflicts but I need that I could call any of these women and they would help out if needed.

  9. Bob Tamez says:

    Hey Trey, been a while since I commented on your posts and this was a good one. I can say that it’s been my experience that a true male friend is a true friend through very good and some not so good bonding. Holding each other accountable and being accountable for each other must be a desire; especially when the not so good bonding is occurs.

    • Trey Morgan says:

      Bob … Thanks for stopping by. Always glad when you you do. Still praying for your family. I’m actually in Miami right now and hope to get to see your daughter tonight. :)

  10. Jo Baird says:

    Everyone probably knows “that to have a friend you have to be a friend.” I’m sure you are the friend so many turn to. I’m proud that you are who and what you are.

  11. Jennifer Muncy says:

    Kudos, Trey!!

  12. Duane Scott says:

    I gotta be honest… not that many guy friends.

    I find it simply…. exhausting… trying to exclaim about the new tractors in the market.

    Guess I need to move away from the corn belt.

  13. Maggie Beth says:

    Well said, as always.

  14. Maggie Beth says:

    BTW ~ Loved this!!!

    Besides, men, we’ll all have six men to carry us when we’re dead, so who’s going to carry us when we’re alive?

    (I AM NOT QUESITONING YOUR CREATIVE SKILLS! but did you make that up~!? If so, you need to go ahead, and get that copy-righted! That is right up there with God is greater than Google!)

    That would make a great book title! Then you could write about the 6 men all men need

    (1) father or father figure,
    (2) spiritual leader
    (3) ???????….

    Okay, you will have to come up with the other 4 — I can’t do EVERYTHING! (LOL!!!!)

    Book or not — yours or not ~~ I won’t forget that comment ~ great visual.

    Maggie B ~

    • Trey Morgan says:

      Maggie, that quote has been around for a long time. I’m not even sure where I’ve heard it, but it is good. I like the idea for the book too. :)

  15. stan says:

    Great article, as usual, Trey.

  16. vanilla says:

    ■Superman had, well no one, but you’re not Superman!

    Though James pointed out that Superman did have friends, this reminder that we are not supermen is well-taken.

    And this is a great post.

  17. Erin Henderson says:

    James has started a men’s ministry that has blown us away. The nearly universal need that men have for friendships is incredible. Most of the men that he is around have no true friends that they can talk through their problems with. We see this ministry as key to our work here in Mexico.

    • Trey Morgan says:

      Erin … I can only imagine how powerful a men’s ministry would be in Mexico. I know James does a great job in this ministry, and I consider him a friend that I could go to at anytime.

  18. Joe says:

    “…nobody’s exempt from Satan’s schemes.”

    Francis Chan wrote in “Crazy Love” that we should be careful not to assume that we are “good soil.” The weeds in our life can choke out the seed. I suppose having others we can confide in, then, would help us weed out the garden and keep the soil clean.

    • Trey Morgan says:

      Joe, good point. I think we both are reading Crazy Love.

      My GPS took me a little different direction, but I was able to catch one of the places to eat you mentioned.

About Me

Trey Morgan Here are my thoughts about marriage, family, raising children, humor, faith and the life God intended for us all. I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.

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