CNN had a great article on marriage last month. They said, “When it comes to marriage, each decade will have its own drama, be it child-rearing, layoffs, second careers, and middle-aged angst, along with a big helping of the in-sickness-and-in-health stuff.” Then they finish the article with 9 really good points to making your marriage last. Here they are in a nutshell…

  1. WATCH YOUR WAISTLINE: Now that you’re married, you can finally relax and skip the gym, right? Wrong. Wedded couples tend to have fatter waistlines, which can spell trouble in terms of sexual attraction and general health.

  2. HAVE A FINANCIAL PLAN: Nearly 40 percent of married people admit to lying to their spouse about a purchase, according to a 2004 poll, and money woes can quickly send your marriage south. In fact, money is the number-one reason couples fight, and relationships tend to suffer during poor economies. You should discuss and agree upon some hard financial ground rules, preferably before you tie the knot.

  3. FIGURE OUT YOUR FAMILY RULES: Couples spend the first 5 to 10 years of their marriage butting heads over how their family should work. You can end up fighting over something as trivial as how you should hang your toilet paper, but those little issues can add up to big problems, particularly if children enter the picture.

  4. MAKE SEX A PRIORITY, BUT NOT A CHORE – It doesn’t matter whether you’re having sex five times a week or five times a year — as long as both of you are happy, says Dr. Goldstein. In fact, a 2008 study found that couples who reported any kind of marital intimacy — everything from holding hands to sex — exhibited lower levels of a hormone produced by stress.

  5. BE FLEXIBLE – Whatever financial and household arrangements you agreed to in your 20s or 30s, chances are they’re going to change at some point in your marriage.

  6. STAY ACTIVE AS YOU AGE – A 1995 study found that couples who work out together are more likely to stick with an exercise program. And some experts suggest that couples who exercise more frequently tend to have better sex lives.

  7. HAVE A FRIEND TO SHARE WITH – It’s often helpful to couple friends when these big issues come up,” says Dr. Robbins. “Many couples live very privately and discuss these issues with the shades down, but relationship issues like this can often benefit from hearing how people that you trust dealt with a similar situation. But, clearly it’s never a good idea to say anything — even to a close friend — that you wouldn’t want repeated back to your spouse in five years,” warns Dr. Goldstein.

  8. REDISCOVER ONE ANOTHER WHEN THE KIDS ARE GONE – Use this new found freedom to bend the rules a bit and rediscover what you love about each other.

  9. BE A GOOD CAREGIVER – In the event of a serious illness, spouses who assume the role of caregiver often develop a sense of “caregiver burden” and may become ill themselves. So it’s vital that both spouses ask for help when they need it. Getting out to see friends and socialize is particularly important for caregivers. And realize that you both have limitations.
Read the full CNN article here.

Also, if you’re looking for more on marriage today, Red Hot Momma has a great post on “Flirting with your Husband.” What man doesn’t love his wife flirting with him (and vice-versa). Also, Patrick Mead has a great article on what people might be looking for that will produce great changes in their lives. All of his points are excellent, especially the first.

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Article by Trey Morgan

I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast. Read 1182 articles by
3 Comments Post a Comment
  1. Frank Bellizzi says:

    Trey, this is such a practical and insightful list. Most married folks will immediately relate to just about every point.

    Reading this reminded me that I shouldn't expect my relationship with my wife to thrive without giving her and us some tender attention. Thanks.

  2. Warren Baldwin says:

    Thanks for making these resources available to us. I appreciate your biblical emphasis on things that affect us in the daily walk of life.

  3. Anonymous says:

    While I know this list stems from the media today, the number 1 priority for a couple is placing God first in each spouses life. We may assume that's top priority, but too many Christians are continuing to experience divorce because we look to the cultural model and neglect God.

About Me

Trey Morgan Here are my thoughts about marriage, family, raising children, humor, faith and the life God intended for us all. I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.

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Trey Morgan
Husband, father and cancer survivor & Senior Minister for the Childress Church of Christ. Tweets about life, marriage, Texas Rangers and randomness.
  • He was pretty tough to listen to as well.
  • As crazy as it might sound, Chris Collinsworth just might be worse to listen to than the song Christmas Shoes.
  • Please remember that some Christmas music is incredibly offensive to people with grandmothers who actually were run over by reindeer.
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  • Chin up Childress Bobcats. We couldn't be prouder. Great fight tonight.

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