10 CRAZY THINGS I’VE SEEN WHILE PREACHING

I’ve preached a lot of sermons over the past 20 years. I’ve seen a lot of “crazy” things while preaching. Here are 10…

  1. People sleeping (of course).
  2. A child playing a Gameboy.
  3. A man on the front pew clipping his toe nails.
  4. My zipper unzipped.
  5. A man doubled-over in pain in the foyer at the back of the auditorium and unable to get any ones attention to help him.
  6. One of my children “wave” at me.
  7. People listening intently (thankfully).
  8. The electricity goes off and it becomes pitch black. Someone lit a small candle, placed it on the pulpit and I was told to keep preaching, so I did.
  9. Hearing the “snap” of a mouse-trap in the empty baptistery behind me and then hearing the “screeching” of a dieing rat through the rest of the sermon (during a gospel meeting at a little country church).
  10. A man getting so tickled at something I said that I had to stop and let him catch his breath before continuing.

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Article by Trey Morgan

I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast. Read 1182 articles by
32 Comments Post a Comment
  1. Gilbert Kerrigan says:

    Before the service every Sunday all of the men that will be participating in some kind of leadership role gathers together to pray. After the prayer someone always yells out “Zipper Check!”

  2. Gilbert Kerrigan says:

    Oh, and I too have watched someone sleeping during my sermon. Then that person proceeded to tell how much she loved my message. I thought about calling her a liar, but I let it go.

  3. NB says:

    Cell phone ringing.

  4. NB says:

    Oops, I guess a cell phone ringing was hearing, not seeing – but it was unbelieveable. The preacher stopped and said, “Just go ahead and answer it.”

  5. Anonymous says:

    “Zipper check!” lol, great idea

    Jimmy Allen, in a class, did a 15 minute rant about all the things he had seen and it was hilarious. he was complaining.
    his list included kids making out, people playing peek-a-boo with babies, etc.

    Last year, had a woman have a seizure during the sermon, I couldn’t tell something was wrong, and saw her fall over….scary

    brian

  6. Robert D. Lukenbill, III says:

    I was preaching in a small country congregation in Louisiana and I saw a small lizzard run across the floor, stop as if to listen and then leave after the invitation song.

    I preached at a small country congregation in Missouri for my first time there and a squirrel got into the transformer and shorted out the electricity about an hour before services. The electric company said it would be hours before it was back on in the middle of summer. So they had some lanterns and I spoke on evolution vs. creationism for Bible class and as I was talking about God creating light, the lights came back on.

    I have also seen young boys playing their gameboys.

    People don’t realize that we see everything that they do while we preach!

  7. The Preacher's Household: says:

    Our preacher in Phoenix said he had a man take off his shoe ever Sunday and smell it. After months of seeing this, he foundly asked what he was doing. The guy was shocked to find out that people could see him while he was sitting in the pew.

    I think cell phones are just rude. I especially think that the song leader leaving to answer a pager is rude.

    Five years ago, James was trying out for a preacher position. I caught his open fly as he was greeting people. He graciously went back into the bathroom and has been paranoid ever sinse.
    Kathy

  8. Frank Bellizzi says:

    The rat story sounds like an absolute classic. At the end of sermon #8, did you sing “Send the Light”?

    One time, as the congregation was standing to sing, coming down off of the platform, I tripped and nearly broke my neck in front of everyone. The song leader tried to catch me and missed. I knocked over a brass stand that was holding one of those fake ferns. After that, I had to stand there and face everyone. Other than a lot of laughing, there were no responses that morning.

  9. lisa leichner says:

    Funny! I’m sure my preacher has seen my kids do all kinds of funny things. But no gameboys in my pew!!! I just can’t imagine someone clipping their toenails during a sermon!! (or anywhere in public for that matter)

    I used to smile at my dad during the invitation song and he always winked back at me. :)

  10. Monalea says:

    Ok, Ok, I’ll put my shoe back on and leave my toenails for later….

    There was a teen boy once that would pick up a songbook/bible and place his paperback novel inside of it and read through church services.

    Monalea aka www

  11. Neva says:

    One time, one of my children (at a very young age) sneezed without covering his mouth and hawked a loogy on the fur collar of the woman in front of us. The preacher smiled and we tried not to laugh –but we left without hugging her. (teehee)

    Peace
    Neva

  12. DJG says:

    The mouse story cracked me up….I remember a cat coming in and walking under the pews….maybe these two churches should hook up…

    I have watched people “text” during the sermon….

  13. Don says:

    trey
    [11] A woman breast feeding
    [12] A brother die of a heart attack
    [13] a dog trot down the center isle and sit 10 feet from me listening to me.
    [14] A brother almost drop the handgun he was carrying in his inside coat pocket.

    YES I PREACHED IN TENNESSEE FOR A WHILE.

  14. The Preacher's Household: says:

    I think you notice these things more in a smaller group. in our auditorium that holds 140 I see everything. When i would preach at Northwest in Phoenix, the auditorium held over 1,000, I couldn’t see much further than the first few pews. In a group that large there were many do all kinds of things. What was most amusing was the people who would go into the cry room with the glass window facing out to see but give some privacy for training and nursing. You would see whole families go in there. i would occasionally notice them from the platform. Strange.

    I’m curious, when my family or a memeber makes a facial expression I know I acknowledge them. Sometimes it is verbally or as part of the sermon. But, if my kid smile or wink etc. do the people find my smile or wink etc. noticeable? Should I avoid responding?

    James

  15. Anonymous says:

    Neva,
    hahhahahahahhahaha

    That cracked me up!

    Paula

  16. TREY MORGAN says:

    This is too fun.

    Frank … no responses? lol

    I did have a graveside funeral recently where a man in the crowd had his cell phone go off. The dumb thing was … he answered it. Said, “I am at a funeral right now, I can’t talk. Can you call me back?” Duh.

  17. Jeff Foster says:

    Trey, I think I was present for #8 on your list. That was at Fairview-Childress, wasn’t it? You had come from Tulia to speak at our GM. I just had the same thing happen to me last Wednesday night . . . right in the middle of teaching a class on Obadiah (teaching Obadiah without lights to read your notes can be tricky!).

    We have a man, an engineer, who brings his laptop to nearly every service, props it open on top of the pew, and works on his CAD programs . . . during the sermon, song service, communion . . . but he can recite back to you every word that is preached. By the way, he does the same thing at dinner parties and church fellowships.

    Blessings,
    Jeff

  18. Gallagher says:

    My daughter put her fingers in her ears so she would not have to listen to me.

    I think my wife dared her to do it.

  19. MESSIANIC GENTILE says:

    When I preach in prison, I start by asking the men to shoot straight with me if they see my fly open. It makes for an ice-breaker! If one is needed. And I don’t worry about it ever again.

    Jesus is Lord!

  20. Matt says:

    Well, Trey in Hawaii when I was preaching our church was located next to a huge avocado tree that made great guacamole every Sunday fellowship, the avocados were huge as well yummm anyways during my sermon I was emphasizing a point and a huge avocado fell on the thin tin roof and Bang!!! and then another and another all I could do was laugh. And wait until the avocado tree was through pelting the church.

    FMtWR

  21. NB says:

    At our church, one Sunday in December, the preacher was introducing a new family to the congregation. Just as he finished introducing them and asking the congregation to welcome them, all the overhead lights and the lights on the Christmas trees immediately went out, the speakers from the sound system made a very loud POP and the alarms began sounding. Mr. & Mrs. Jones experienced an unforgettable welcome that morning!

  22. TREY MORGAN says:

    Jeff … I do remember the lights going out at the Fairview church. I can’t remember what we did, but I remember it happening.

    The time I remember the candle being lit I was in a small little church in Northern New Mexico preaching a meeting for them. They had about 14 people there and many had driven from miles and miles away just for the meeting. The had not had a “preacher” come in years.

    About 10 minutes in the lights went out and I said … “You want me to quit?” They said, “Keep preaching for at least 45 minutes.” I’m not sure I’ve ever had a request for 45 minute sermons other than there.

  23. KJKEB says:

    Speaking of sleeping in church… I once preached at a rescue mission. While I preached a guy walked around the chapel and tapped guys on the shoulder with a long stick if they were sleeping. You see, you had to stay awake for the message in order to eat later that evening.

    I put ’em to sleep and the ushers woke them back up!

  24. WendyC says:

    We have a guy (yes, a guy not a gal) who knitted very bright and colourful sweaters during the sermon. And when I do computer duty 9we have your songs on computer), the guy (young guy of about 19) who does the sound and sits next to me in the back row spends the whole sermon biting his nails. Ewwwwwwwwwww.

  25. The Preacher's Household: says:

    When I was in college one of my friends led the night time singing at Encounter. After his part was done and they were on to something else before the speaker, he sat down beside me, crossed his legs and promptly feel asleep. The speakers squealed, and he kicked the guy infront of him in the elbow which caused that guy to wakeup. It was a good thing because he was the speaker. It had been a tiring week.

    Josh’s first known super power was the ability to projectile hurl up to three pews a head. His reflux problem didn’t end until he was over a year old.
    Kathy

  26. jel says:

    Hey Trey,
    have ya ever thought of writting a book, about this? even got a title for ya~ (From the otherside of the Pew)

  27. TREY MORGAN says:

    Jel, I like that idea. I’d have to include funeral stories. I don’t know what it is about me and funerals, but crazy things happen to me at funerals. Funny, funny stuff.

    :)

  28. lisa says:

    I like that title, Janice. :)

  29. NB says:

    Maybe next week, you can write about the Top 10 Funeral Flubs and Follies.

  30. Anonymous says:

    My father, in his later life, had a difficult time staying awake in services, mostly because he could not clearly hear what was going on. He continued attending because that was where he wanted to be, with God’s people worshipping to the best of his ability. I commended him saying that his presence was a testimony to others of his dedication to doing his best for the Lord, even though at times it wasn’t as good as others might think.

    I know of a woman who brought her knitting to worship, and other adults who whispered to another, even during the time of remembering the Lord and what He had done for her.

    My husband never complained about babies crying, or children writing during his lessons, but it always saddened him to see how some adults behaved – and as was mentioned – he could observe that.

    Too many people attend because of habit – what they have always done – with no real thought to the meaning of why we attend. Songs are sung because of habit, too, not because the meaning of the songs touches the heart.

    I pray that I not become a creature of habit. Jeanne Mohundro

  31. TREY MORGAN says:

    Jeanne … you bring up a good thought that should be addressed.

    There are those older people who can’t help falling asleep. My mom, like your dad, has a hard time staying awake during the sermon due to the medication she’s on. I think we have to be patient with people who sleep, they may have a very good reason.

    Also, babies have never bothered me. I love hearing them. It means we have a future.

  32. preacherman says:

    Trey,
    My son brings his gameboy to Church. He just puts it on mute. I think it is okay. It is like the etch-A-skatch when we were little.

About Me

Trey Morgan Here are my thoughts about marriage, family, raising children, humor, faith and the life God intended for us all. I am a Christian husband and father, who moonlights as the minister for the church of Christ in Childress, Texas. My wife Lea and I have been married for 25 years. We are doing our best to raise our 4 boys, who are all growing up way too fast.

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Trey Morgan
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Husband, father and cancer survivor & Senior Minister for the Childress Church of Christ. Tweets about life, marriage, Texas Rangers and randomness.
  • good list. Don't forget Nickelback, OJ, ISIS and beer-throwing Blue Jay fans.
  • He was pretty tough to listen to as well.
  • As crazy as it might sound, Chris Collinsworth just might be worse to listen to than the song Christmas Shoes.
  • Please remember that some Christmas music is incredibly offensive to people with grandmothers who actually were run over by reindeer.
  • Unfortunately, not a great night for "bobcats." :)

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