FOR MORE INFO … go to StrongerMarriageWorkshops.com and click on the “EVENTS” tab.
FOR MORE INFO … go to StrongerMarriageWorkshops.com and click on the “EVENTS” tab.
TAKE THIS TEST … WE DARE YOU
There are two types of people in this world … people who like their bed made everyday … and those who say, “Why would I make the bed when I’m just going to get back in it later?.” Lea is is a bed maker, and yes, I’m the other guy. She sees that our bed is made perfectly everyday.
Over time I have learned that Lea’s “love language” is acts of service, and shefeels loved when I do little things to serve her. So occasionally while Lea’s having her morning coffee, I’ll sneak in the room and make the bed for her … and yes I’ll put all 72 little pillows exactly where they go on the bed. Okay, so there’s really not 72 pillows on our bed, but it seems like it to a guy who doesn’t see the need in making beds.
What I’m trying to say is this … learn your spouse’s love language and then speak it. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 basic love languages and every person has their “main” love language they need the most. Here are the 5 different love languages …
1. WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
2. GIFT GIVING
3. ACTS OF SERVICE
4. QUALITY TIME
5. PHYSICAL TOUCH
Do you know your spouse’s love language? Lea’s main love language is “Acts of Service”, while mine is “Touch”. If you’re not sure, take the free online test here and get busy speaking your spouse’s love language …
EVERY WIFE WANTS TO HEAR…
1. I love you.
2. I am listening to you.
3. Is there anything I can pray about?
4. You look amazing!
5. You are my best friend.
6. Thank you for all you do.
7. I’m cooking dinner, what would you like?
8. Time for some “you time”, I’m taking the kids.
9. Being married to you is the best.
10. I arranged for a sitter and our date night is planned.
11. You are a great mother.
12. I’m so glad you are my wife.
EVERY HUSBAND WANTS TO HEAR…
1. I appreciate how you provide for our family.
2. You are my hero.
3. What would you like me to fix for supper?
4. I want to make love to you.
5. Let’s do something together, you choose.
6. I love you.
7. I love being your wife.
8. You’re a great dad.
9. You are a great lover.
10. I respect you.
11. You look amazing.
12. I’d marry you all over again.
When it comes to marriage, Lea and I struggle with the same things you struggle with. We often find ourselves taking one another for granted for the sake of less important things. Things like busyness, ministries, work and hobbies will always crowd a marriage for time, but I think the biggest challenge for any marriage, including ours, is balancing marriage and raising children. This is especially a struggle when you have young children.
I firmly believe that the ONLY thing that should be more important than your marriage is your relationship with God. Raising your children should be of the utmost importance, but not to the degree that you put your relationship with your husband/wife on the back burner. One couple recently said this about their marriage, “We don’t have a marriage. We have a business. We make money, pay bills and raise kids, period.” How sad!
I’m amazed at how many people justify putting their marriages on the back burner for their children’s sake. If you invest all your energies into your children and none into your marriage, your marriage will struggle to survive when the kids are grown. What happens is, once the kids are grown, you’ll look across the table at your marriage partner and realize you really don’t have anything in common anymore.
So to keep your marriage happy and healthy, you’re going to have to be willing to invest time in it. Finding time to reconnect in your marriage is healthy. Lea and I strongly feel that raising our boys takes lots of time and energy, but not to the point that we lose the healthiness of our marriage. We personally feel that we must reconnect regularly for our marriage to remain healthy. Sometimes we reconnect in our marriage by simply …
Our children are SO important in our lives, and we should be investing a ton of time into the ministry of parenthood. But our children also need to see their parents display a healthy marriage, and for that to happen it takes investing time. That’s why finding ways to reconnect is so important.
SPEND MORE TIME TOGETHER. Make a commitment to spend more time together and make a weekly date night with your spouse a priority. This may take you sitting down together with your spouse and planning out your schedule. BRAG ON YOUR SPOUSE DAILY. Any old lame critic can pick out someone’s faults; instead focus on […]Full Story »
We love the Samsung commercial where the wife shares a video with her husband and says, “I also have a video for you, but you probably shouldn’t watch it on the plane.” 99.9% of the men in this world that have seen that commercial sat there thinking, “Hey, I’m going to buy one of those […]Full Story »
College should be one of the best times in your life because you are out on your own and making your own choices. BUT college should NEVER be the time you ditch God and your faith in order to experience the world. I read recently where 70% of college students quit Christianity during college … despite […]Full Story »
We don’t believe anyone ever goes looking to have an affair. Instead, affairs happen over time when we let our guard down and quit focusing on our marriages. One of the best things you can do to keep your marriage strong is to pay attention to the signs that your relationship is headed in the […]Full Story »
Thank God for your spouse and marriage. Ask God to bless your spouse. Ask God to give you and your spouse wisdom. Ask God to bless your spouse to be a good parent. Pray for your future together. Pray that you will keep your priorities straight. Pray that you and your spouse will guard your […]Full Story »
Husbands, when you think of the word ‘romance’ you often think of sex, but for a woman romance means something totally different. Romance to a woman are the little things you do like bringing her flowers, surprising her with a dinner out, small talk, a night without distractions, help with the kids and dishes, etc. […]Full Story »
Here’s what one of our seminars looks like … ]Full Story »
We believe that no couple should ever stop dating. Getting a babysitter and going out for a romantic dinner, a movie, a play, a concert or even playing golf together keeps a couple emotionally connected. Ask each other out on dates, plan them, and enjoy each other as you did when you were younger, single […]Full Story »
A marriage is made up of two imperfect people, so that means there is no such thing as a perfect marriage … nor will there ever be. Lea and I have made our share of mistakes. In fact, many of the things we share with you on this page are the very things we’ve learned […]Full Story »
The following is a link where you can find our upcoming Stronger Marriage Workshop events… https://www.facebook.com/StrongerMarriageWorkshops/eventsFull Story »
Spoke in Red River, New Mexico this morning and had several ask about note. Here they are … 10 TRAITS OF A HEALTHY FAMILY… 1. Displays an irrational love. 2. Have healthy communication. 3. Have no favorites or black sheep. 4. Don’t abuse or shame. 5. Place a priority on God. 6. Teach service […]Full Story »
WELCOME TO DUMP DAY 2014 … This is a day that we stop to consider how blessed we are materially and share with those who are not. Hungry people need fed for another year. There are children at Buen Samaritano who get one meal a day, 5 days a week. For many of those kids, […]Full Story »
Welcome to the “7 Day Spouse Challenge” that we introduced today on our Facebook marriage page. This challenge is for couples who would like to grow in their marriage and make HUGE positive changes in just 7 days. We honestly feel like if BOTH spouses are willing to participate completely for the next 7 days, […]Full Story »
Remember all those things you did before you we’re married to win your spouse? Like…. * Calling just to say “hello” * Buying them little surprises * Dating * Talking for hours * Holding hands * Praising one another * Wanting to spent time together * Flirting * Trying hard to look nice for him/her […]Full Story »
A few years ago when Lea and I celebrated our 20th anniversary, I decided that I needed to do something new to show her how much I still loved her. Not anything drastic, but just something new after 20 years to say, “You still rock my world.” So I decided on our 20th that it […]Full Story »
Sometimes it’s the subtle and sneaky things that creep into our marriages that destroy the relationship. Little things so gradual that we don’t really notice them before they’ve become HUGE problems. Be on guard of subtle things like these… 1. LIFE STARTS TAKING PRIORITY OVER YOUR MARRIAGE. Things like paying bills, work, children all start […]Full Story »
1. THE UNEXPECTED SURPRISES. Women love unexpected surprises you give them. An occasional unexpected small gift, come home from work early for some quality time or surprise her with a romantic night out. Consider some weekend morning greeting her with breakfast in bed when she wakes up or fix her favorite meal and clean up […]Full Story »
1. Make God a priority in your relationship. 2. Make the relationship a priority. 3. Compliment instead of criticize. 4. Be affectionate with your words and actions. 5. Keep the spark in your sex life. 6. Communicate. 7. Never keep secrets from your spouse. 8. Date. 9. Never stop pursuing your spouse. 10. Don’t stop […]Full Story »
The circle of life is pretty amazing when you think about it. In the same hospital … just a short distance apart, I saw life and death this week. I stood yesterday in a room with a proud new mom and dad as they welcomed their new baby boy into this world. This young family […]Full Story »
Lea and I have 3 cordless phones in our house. We’ve learned that if you leave any of them off the charger for more than a day, the battery dies. Nothing is more frustrating than trying to answer a ringing phone that has a dying or dead battery. Everyday we have to make sure that […]Full Story »
About 5 miles west of Childress is a prison that houses 1200 men. National statistics say, “85% of those sitting in prison today grew up in a fatherless home,” that just goes to show you the powerful roll fathers play in the lives of their children. God has blessed me with four incredible boys. As […]Full Story »
I still remember my first real sermon. It was on a Sunday night in a small country church. They’d asked me to fill in that night while their preacher was gone and this teenager was really nervous about it. I’d done a couple of short Wednesday night devotionals, but NEVER a real Sunday sermon. I […]Full Story »
This is a follow up post to the last blog I wrote about making how churches and change. I wrote about how churches need to be constantly looking for areas to grow and sometimes it requires stoping things you’ve been doing for years, and trying new things. You can find that post here … “The […]Full Story »
This is my buddy Seth. He helped me illustrate my lesson last Sunday morning as we talked about how people carry around unnecessary baggage in their lives. At the end of the 25 minute sermon, I finally let him put all the heavy bags down and his response was perfect. As he dropped […]Full Story »
I visited with a couple the other day that was absolutely scared to death of anything changing in their church. They knew their church was declining, drying up and dying, but they wanted nothing to do with trying anything new and expected everything to be left exactly the same as it always had been the […]Full Story »
This is a sermon I preached last Sunday after the passing of one of our leaders, Johnnie Lott. Johnnie was a great husband, father, brother, and for 32 years he served as an elder in the church where I preach in Childress. His children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren are a testament to the God-fearing, loving and […]Full Story »
ANGER – Uncontrolled anger, intimidation and bullying have NO place in marriage. Watch your tone. Anger does NO good, only harm. Remove it. CRITICISM – Listen to me, treat your spouse with kindness and respect. Your job is to build them up, NOT to tear them down. NO ONE wants to live with a critic. […]Full Story »
Sermon Series on Marriage (1 of 3)Full Story »
Our marriage material hasn’t disappeared … it’s moved If you follow our blog for MARRIAGE posts and updates, we’re doing most of those now on Facebook that you can find by clicking here… http://www.facebook.com/StrongerMarriageWorkshops Stop by and hit the “like” button.Full Story »
My heart is broken … yesterday was a bad day for the poor in Honduras. My friend Marc Tindall, our missionary from Honduras that coordinates all our work there, called yesterday to say he’d been robbed right after leaving the bank. Two men on motorcycles grabbed Marc’s backpack that he’d just filled with money to […]Full Story »